My son and myself.

Who do you spend the most time with?

I am locked into some kind of weird loveless marriage.

I can’t completely blame my wife for whatever mental health problems she has, and I stay with her because I don’t want to know what would happen to her if I left her. I care about her enough to want to make sure that she is ok. Often I am not sure if she feels the same way.

But we have a son.

My son, My Buddy…

I love my son more than anything in the world.

Although I only want what is best for him Inlet him find his own way.

I wanted him to have the childhood that I had full of vacations and special occasions and the perfect home.

But I failed him.

I only blame myself, although my wife made it incredibly difficult.

Despite my failure to provide my son with the same kind of upbringing that I had, I make sure that I am there for him.

I spend most of my time with my son.

Telling him what he is doing wrong and doing right.

I make sure he has clean clothes, plenty to eat and the comfort of knowing that I will always be there for him.

He is 13, I listen to all of his ramblings and tell him what I think. Someday I hope that he remembers how I always stopped what I am doing to listen to him.

As much as I hate to say it, my son is my world.

I make sure that he is the person I spend most of my time with, because he is the most important person I have ever known.

Because he is my son.

No matter how defiant, dissobideient, or weird he is. I like to spend most of my time with him, just so that he knows I am there watching over him.

Some accuse me of being a “helicopter parent” to them I say I am a “digital parent.”

I am everywhere.

I spend time with him when he wakes up in the morning and when he comes home from school.

I cook his diner and still try to take him everywhere I go.

I have been to every event of his childhood just so that he can see my face in the crowd.

Recently the thought crossed my mind, what if he no longer looked for my face in the crowd?

Or what if he looked and I was not there?

I don’t like to think about that question and that is why I am always there.

Because the person I spend most of my time with and the person I want to spend most of my time with even if he does not know it.

Is my son.